It is still very difficult for me to wrap my mind around having an open relationship, but at times I find myself conflicted, let me explain why. When you ask those that are, or have been, in an open relationship they always give the same explanation.
An open relationship is a committed relationship when both partners agree to have physical and/or emotional relations with others. But isn’t a committed relationship supposed to consist of exclusivity and monogamy? However, each relationship is different. Two people should be allowed to design their relationship to how they see fit.
In the end it’s all about you and your partner’s happiness, right? Is it really impossible for some to just have one person fulfill all their needs? Who has one of anything nowadays? I remember when people were ecstatic to have one house, one car or one cell phone. Now people have two or three of everything. Are we just that greedy? Is one really just a lonely number? Why isn’t one of anything good enough? I think we live in a time where greed is so widely accepted we create these terms like polyamorous relationships.
Honestly, and this is just my opinion, an open relationship is both partners choosing to give in to their greed and lust. They don’t want to give up one another and they want to see other people. Period. But I can’t be bias when it comes to this topic because it is such a touchy subject. So let’s move forward. I also think there is something wonderful about two people who are in love that can be mature enough to discuss something like this. I’ll be honest if my partner ever came to me wanting an open relationship let’s just say I’m not mature enough to handle it.
As a female, let me say a sometimes insecure female, I would feel like I wasn’t good enough or I was doing something wrong for him to want to see other people. Maybe I’m just not mature enough to handle an open relationship but I do applaud those who are strong enough to endure their partner sleeping with other people. If you feel secure enough in your partner and your relationship to have an open relationship then that’s great, at the end of the day it’s about whatever makes you and your partner happy.
Your relationship. Your rules. Maybe I’m old fashion or just selfish. I want it to be me and the person that I’m in love with, that’s all. It’s hard enough dealing with temptation and trusting your partner to stay committed to you. I can’t imagine my partner sleeping with other people but still thinking that what we have is special so he’ll always come home to me.
Not to sound blunt or harsh but did you ever stop to think that you are both wrong and delusional or just plain greedy. What if someone comes along and they have a stronger connection? You only have yourself to blame because you allowed your partner to venture off to be with another person.
What if one wants to end the open relationship and go back to just being faithful to one another? Is that even possible? I can go on with the “what ifs” all day. At the end of this it’s still your relationship and your rules. Good luck. You’re going to need it.